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Jordan is a Picker. Are You a Picker Too?

She was very brave to confess this here on LambAround. Hopefully you won't judge her too harshly, especially as I have been a secret picker for years. Maybe, just maybe, we will be accepted by society one day!


Also, be sure to leave a comment so you'll be eligible to Win A Le Creuset Stock Pot! Yes, my dear readers, I do plan to remind you until the cows come home :p


My name is Jordan and I'm a picker. There. I've said it. Try as hard as I might to resist picking I cannot do it. I've been like this as long as I can remember. It's turned into an addiction, I can't just stop. It's not even that fun anymore, just something I am compelled to do to make it through the day.

It started out innocently enough, as a child my mother and I would search through bags of potato chips looking for 'good ones' - c'mon you know what I mean, the folded, extra crunchy, extra potaoty, nom, nom, nom....... Nothing was better then when I'd pull out the crown jewel of the bag, wave it around like a trophy and then pop it in my triumphant little mouth.

psssst hey kid, like what you see?

Soon I had moved on to ice cream- rocky road being my favorite. I discovered if you popped a half gallon in the microwave for about 40 seconds it would be soft enough to allow for easy excavation of the chocolate covered nuts and marshmallow bits, but still hard enough to make you work for it a bit. As I've gotten older I've started to go to further lengths to achieve the same high- dumping chocolate chips into peanut butter only for the joy of fishing them out- digging through banana-nut muffins to find the walnuts, even now as I write this I am in the process of
rummaging through a Lucky Charms box to get at a the sugary nuggets of goodness within.

I have tried to stop this serial(see what I did there?) picking. I know that other people, namely Carl, would like to have some of the treats hidden within as well, I tell myself

'Self, stop doing this. You are approaching 30 and this is disgusting. Nobody wants to eat your picked-over rejects.'

I really want to stop but this thing takes over me and it's all

'Just one more, ok, er,.. one more, uhhh last one? one more last time, please?'

Damn, now I'm jonesing for some jelly beans, but just the white ones.

Comments

  1. Hey. ok so my dear friend.....calls me one day and says her and her daughter bought one of those deli chickens and they picked the breast meat. But...they had the legs, back thighs etc. and didn't want to throw it away. They live out of town and were not heading home for a while, she said,"I can drop it by if you want."
    I said, "Sure". yep! Good pickers share!!

    ReplyDelete

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