Kitty Deschanel

I am a thrifty person. Not cheap , just thrifty. Okay, maybe it would be accurate to say that I'm up along the very border of cheap. Only my toes are over the line. Today I would like to share a story from my college years, when I was working as a Pizza Hut manager, about one of the many times trying to save a few dollars has put me in a stupid situation. I had a coupon for a free car wash. The regular price was $4.99, so without the coupon there was no way I would ever be getting my car cleaned. My car wasn’t dirty enough to justify using the coupon, so I continued to put off using it until the day before it expired. Although it was the middle of January, I took my Alero through the automatic car wash after leaving work, shortly before midnight. It was the last day before the specials changed at the grocery store, so after the thorough washing, I decided to drive next door to do a little grocery shopping before going home. I zipped inside right before the store closed and came

I was recently able to get away on a short vacation, which was perfect, but getting there was a comedy of errors. It all started the night before my flight, when I was going to finish up a few last-minute errands, then get to bed nice and early. My mom had even agreed to spend the night at my house, ensuring she wouldn't be late to take me to the airport. I had all my ducks in a row. Errand #1: Order the Shabby Apple Alana dress I'd been eyeing. By ordering it before my trip, I could take advantage of a MyPoints promotion for free United Airlines miles. I'd been thinking about which dress to buy all week, and was finally certain of my decision. My mom was sitting next to me and she glanced over at my computer as I was on the final checkout screen. It's super-cute and flattering, right? "That's the dress you're buying?" my mom asked, making a face. "Ugh!" I'd thought the dress was very me. I envisioned myself wearing it everywhe

Once upon a time, there was a Grump. He didn't always used to be a Grump. Maybe it was his skepticism of the value of a staycation. Perhaps he was frustrated with people judging his water-carrying backpack, saying that he was much too close to home to dress like such a tourist. Some people just don't like Santa Fe. "Santa Fe people," thought the Grump "are a bunch of hippies. I will not smile, no matter how much my cute wife wants a photo of me in front of the Santa Fe sign. You must never smile at a hippie or they will steal your power." When faced with the prospect of walking to Canyon Road to browse the art galleries, the Grump crumpled his oversized hat in frustration. "We have perfectly good art in Albuquerque," he muttered.  Shopping at the Santa Fe Plaza only seemed to create a Sleepy Grump. "We rode the Rail Runner train here," he was quick to point out. "You can't get any of this junk home. It's a

Sexy Nerd and I have been together for more than 11 years. Keep this in mind while reading the following conversation we had yesterday: Sexy Nerd: Hey! You know what I noticed the other night? You have sleep apnea. Me: Wha?! Sexy Nerd: You just stopped breathing the other night. You weren't breathing for, like, a minute. Then, you were gasping for breath. Then, you woke up. That must have been the cause of your insomnia problem all along. Sleep apnea! Me: So, you think I've always stopped breathing for dangerous amounts of time, every night that you've known me? Sexy Nerd: Yeah! Me: And...you never noticed...in more than eleven years? Sexy Nerd: ... Me: And how long were you going to wait to see if I started breathing again? A minute seems like kind of a long time, don't you think? Sexy Nerd: ...I...didn't want to risk waking you ...because I love you... So, apparently this is what my (most likely shortened) future holds: CPAP machine - no