Kitty Deschanel | Food, Wine, and Travel Adventures Across the USA

I installed the Lumosity brain training app weeks ago, then completely forgot about it until last night. That should have been my first clue. To get started with the app, I played three games which tested my "Memory Matrix", "Speed Match", and "Train of Thought" and received a Fit Test score.    Yes! I am a genius. Take that, inferior drolls of society, and bow before my greatness. Surely even Stephen Hawking gets distracted from time to time. Even so, this score was a disappointment after my victorious Speed Match test and seemed not-at-all geniusy. Further salting the wound, 76 is my most hated number. Come to think of it, 76 is my only hated number. (It's a long, dragon-related story.) The Train of Thought test had to be defective. My remaining score would concrete my value to society and elevate me to godlike status. Even better, Sexy Nerd would be super impressed. I am an idiot.

Our 9 year wedding anniversary is almost here already! These photos were taken on January 10th, 2008 on our way from the wedding at Kualoa Ranch on Oahu to the reception at Lei Lei's Turtle Bay. It was the 4 year anniversary of our first date. So young. So dorky. While visiting Sexy Nerd's family for the 4th of July, the topic of our bizarre wedding came up. No one believed me about some of the things that our wedding officiant, Captain Howie, had discussed during the ceremony. Most of them were there though. They must have blocked the craziness out. Luckily, everything was recorded. Click the image to enlarge - you won't regret it! He'd totally been smoking the Maui Wowie, right?  There had been some red flags about using Above Heaven's Gate and Captain Howie for our wedding. For example, after months of communicating through email, we called and were told to hang on so they could get someone who speaks Spanish. You know, because we live in New Mexico. At the...

January 2017 will mark twelve years at my job at a children's dental office, which is 99% of the reason Sexy Nerd and I don't have any kids. It's a job I mostly love, unexpected as it started as just an internship-like side gig between college classes and my "real" job. Here's a little taste of what I've been putting up with during that time, with the name of my boss changed for privacy...though any computer-savvy person will be able to figure out the real name without much sleuthing: Me: Thank you for calling Dr. Simon’s office. This is Kitty. How may I help you? *Beep* Me: Hello? *Boop* Me: This is Dr. Simon’s office. Can you hear me? Angry Caller: I WANT TO TALK TO A REAL PERSON (followed by a surprisingly long list of profanities) Awkward silence Me:   This is Kitty with Dr. Simon’s office…I’m a real person. Angry Caller: YOU’RE A REAL PERSON? Me: Yes. Are you trying to reach Dr. Simon’s office? Angry Caller: WELL IT’S A...