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Valentines Day: Darn You, Sexy Nerd

Did Sexy Nerd sweep me off my feet for our 2nd Valentines Day as a married couple? Well, not exactly. Not at all, in fact. I had told him beforehand that he didn't need to buy me anything - just being nice to me would be a perfect day. Specifically, I wanted him to give me a massage (which he never, ever does!)

Sexy Nerd remembered that he didn't need to give me a gift, but he forgot the part about being nice. The day started with him getting out of bed before I woke up. When I came downstairs, he was on the couch, watching racing (he is always watching racing! As I write this, he's watching drag racing! Earlier, he was watching Nascar!) I told him that I was going to go get his gift. I assumed that he would also be getting my gift while I was away. Nope. Here is a word of advice, guys. When your wife or girlfriend says that you don't have to get her anything, don't not get her anything! At least a card would have been nice. Or chocolate! FYI, Sexy Nerd, I loooooove chocolate!

Next, I made myself a bowl of oatmeal for breakfast. Sexy Nerd must have sensed that I was unhappy with him (maybe it was the occasional "sigh" sound coming from the other room) because he pulled himself away from watching racing to see what I was up to. He told me he was going to make breakfast, but since I was already eating, he went back to watching TV. He was going to make breakfast?? He had been up for over an hour!

The day progressed with more TV and more ignoring each other (a typical day for us), with the exception of me making Sexy Nerd a fancy lunch and 2 kinds of his favorite cookies. We also went to see a performance at Popejoy Hall (this was part of the ticket package I bought Sexy Nerd for our 2 year anniversary). That night, it seemed for a moment that Sexy Nerd was going to redeem himself. He made dinner! Well, technically he just heated dinner up (canned cream of chicken soup), but based on how little he'd done for Valentines Day (nothing), him making soup was impressive.

Sexy Nerd lost all his dinner-making points when he asked me if I wanted any of the soup!

Going to bed, I asked Sexy Nerd if he'd had a good Valentines Day. Yes, he said. He had loved his gift and his fancy lunch and his homemade cookies (2 different kinds!). Sick of his selfish, lazy ways, I told him it was the worst Valentines Day ever and went to sleep in the other room. In typical "Sexy" Nerd fashion, he went to sleep instead of following me.

At some point during the night, or perhaps when he was at work the next day, it occured to Sexy Nerd that he was in quite a bit of trouble. So, I came home from work to this:

Alton Brown's Enchilada Lasagna - it tastes a lot better than it looks!

Damn. How can I stay mad at that?

Still, I had better get some chocolate next year!


  1. I left you something on my blog!

  2. My nerd was and hour late to pick me up from work because he decided to go back to sleep after I called to tell him I was off. He got me roses though, and then we went to dinner and were in bed asleep by 10pm. The end.

  3. ... enjoy reading your humor ...

  4. Wow. This is a sad story. But, for one thing I am actually glad there is another lady out there who has a similar no-gift-Valentines days like me. Sometimes I feel like I have to beg for flowers. Anyway, I am glad he made you cake and dinner the next day. That was very thoughtful. Any massage in there, perhaps?

  5. Boys are so clueless. That sounds like the exact crap my husband pulls sometimes.

  6. Ack! It drives me bonkers when my hubby goest to sleep when I'm steaming mad. He sure can cook, though. I think most men have to learn the hard way that "you don't have to buy me anything" doesn't mean you don't have to do anything.

  7. I feel your pain! I'm on year #6 with no birthday presents. My first Valentine's Day present was last year. Why is it no matter how smart they are, they can be so clueless?!

  8. My nerd asks me every year what day Valentine's day is, he never gets it! The lasagna looks really good, I will have to look that recipe up.


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