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Getting All Teary-Eyed

Earlier at work, we were sitting around talking about someone who had recently passed away. Although it was sad and I feel terrible for the people who were close to him, I had never met the person and did not feel compelled to cry, yet sat there rubbing my eye and rapidly blinking throughout the entire, hour-long conversation. The two other women involved in the conversation probably thought Don't sit there trying to fake cry! You're pathetic! but I was only doing it because there was something in my eye. It was driving me CRAZY, but I couldn't very well get up and leave to look in the mirror while someone was pouring their grieving heart out. So, I sat there politely, squinting and nonchalantly closing one eye periodically, in a sympathetic sort of wink, until I was alone. Finally, I thought, inspecting my eye in the mirror. 

It turned out that the thing irritating my eye is GROWING FROM MY EYELID! What the heck do I do now? According to Dr. Google, (my primary care physician) I have a stye. It’s not anywhere near as disgusting as the images that Dr. Google showed me (really, Dr. Google, there is such a thing as too much information!) but now I’m worried that this may just be the beginning and that I’ll wake up tomorrow to discover that my eyelid is swollen shut and bright pink, along with half my face! Dr. Google, along with colleague Dr. Wikipedia, has also advised me that this insanely annoying eyelid bump may stick around for the next 10 days unless sticking a needle into it! Ummm, not exactly comfortable with that idea, thanks! Sensing my anxiety, Dr. Wikipedia offered this little gem of information:

Stye surgery is performed by an ophthalmologist in his office, and generally under local anesthesia. The procedure consists in making a small incision on the inner or outer surface of the eyelid depending if the stye is pointing externally or not. After the incision is made, the pus is drained out of the gland and very small and unnoticeable sutures are used to close the lesion. It is common that the removed stye is biopsied to rule out the possibility of skin cancer.

Oh.My.God.I.Am.Going.To.Freaking.Die! Oh, did I mention that I just had a doctor’s appointment (with a REAL doctor) 2 days ago? Would’ve been nice for this wacky eye problem to appear just a little sooner (or not at all!)

Make fun of me now, Sexy Nerd, but you're going to feel like quite the jerk when I'm 6 feet under from stye-poisoning

So, who out there has a fabulous* home remedy for me?

*Not-so-fabulous remedies need not apply


  1. Honestly, if you went to an eye doctor they would probably just give you drops! I had one when I was a little girl and it went away with some minor treatment!

  2. Oh don't worry sweetie, I'm pretty sure there's a cream for it.

    I've had two or three in my life. They're annoying, but really, they don't last ten days. Mine have lasted three days, tops.

  3. Sorry, no home remedy here. Just a little genuine sympathy, 'cause stye = SUCK! Hang in there, hope it goes away soon.

  4. I think if you leave it alone, it'll go away soon. If it's really bothering you, you can put a washcloth with warm water on it to help it out a little (I picked that up from Dr. Internet somewhere). But it's probably better just to leave it alone!

  5. I'm no help in the stye department. I thought that's what I had and mine have never gone away. I'm guessing now I have something else If I've wanted to get rid of them, I've always had to kind of dig them out. I've had one on my eyelid now for about a year and I can't get at it and it doesn't bother me so I haven't done anything about it. I was just at the eye doctor this morning. I wish I had read this sooner; I could have asked for you. I hope it gets better soon!

  6. Try holding a wash cloth with warm water on your eye several times a day. And maybe avoid make-up til its gone.

  7. No remedies...the internet does me in every time I have any problem...I am sure I won't make it through the night!


    I owe you an email about the post...I'll get there!

  8. Julie, your comment has freaked me out even more!! :p

  9. Eek, ugh and ew! Eye stuff totally freaks me out. But every time I have any weird eye stuff I try the over-the-counter conjunctivitis (pink eye) drops -- they work more often than not. Good luck -- ew!

  10. Ooh! Ooh! Pick me! They make an ointment for that! I want to say it's called Opthalmic Erythromycin. It still involves an inconvenient trip to the doc, but it works like a charm.

    Thanks for the comment over at my place. Love your blog! :-)

  11. Yes, Opthmalic Erythromycin. And my question is what's wrong with blowing you nose on the towel before it goes in the hamper? It's not like you are drying your hair with it after you do, right? Thanks for visiting OuisaForPresident

  12. I definitely would avoid all makeup. You might contaminate your mascara. ;)

    Sorry about your eye. It is okay to see a doctor for those things you know. They appreciate your illness, I mean business.

  13. I seem to be prone to those irritating little bumps and sometimes get one on the lower lid, ooh ugly. HOT HOT compresses as hot as you can stand them. Hold on your eye until cloth cools and do again. Repeat several times a day - believe me it will stop itching and go away!

  14. Hey! Thanks for stopping by my blog. My boyfriend had an eye stye (I couldn't stop saying that for weeks after he went to the doctor. Eye stye. Eye stye.) He put a VERY hot washcloth on it several times a day for several minutes at at time, and it went away in a few days.

    Good luck and keep us updated.

    By the way, how do you get Blogher to do ads on your site?

  15. I have had quite a few styes. I had them when I was little and they burst them with a needle and it wasnt bad at all. More recently I have had one and I would hold a wet cloth as hot as I could handle on my eye and after a few times of that it went away. I hope this helps.

    Thanks for the comment over at my blog:)

  16. Bless you, anything to do with eyes is uncomfortable. It should go away on its own but a hot cloth should help. The old wife's tale was always to rub it with a gold ring!! I wouldn't try it though...

  17. OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD! Sorry, no remedy, just horrifying HORROR! I'm horrified!! (Can you tell?). I HATE eye problems. EW! I am phobic of having my eyes touched. Funny I should come upon this post b/c just the other night I had something in my eye. I was calling it my "wool eye" b/c it felt like a piece of wool was in my eye and everything was fuzzy. Thankfully I woke up with it gone. I don't know how I would have coped.

    Dr. Google is rather grim, isn't she?

    Hope you feel better!!!


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About Kitty Deschanel

About Kitty Deschanel
I'm a freelance writer who believes in infusing all topics, from Jessner peels to chronic insomnia, with a dose of humor. Thanks to their endless shenanigans, my Sexy Nerd (SN) and our "children", Pica and Biscuit, make frequent appearances on my blog. I have written for major brands including Dove, Anheuser-Busch, and Jimmy Dean and my work has been featured on Huffington Post. Connect with me on Twitter and Instagram @KittyDeschanel.

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